Thanksgiving week...

This week always goes entirely too fast. My parents have been coming down to visit this week for the last several years. They get here on the Saturday before Thanksgiving and leave the Saturday after. They left today.
We cram in visiting my brother's house, shopping, playtime with kids, shopping, outings, eating and shopping into one week and it's never long enough. There is always great anticipation by Hayden and then he can't get enough of Grandma and Grandpa. Maya was all over them this year! I think they both memorized her books in the week they were here.
This is a short post, I am tired from a day of decorating and sewing and have a crappy cold. I always, always enjoy my time spent with my parents. But, it is always so dang hard when they have to leave. I can't hold back tears, I can't hide my sadness. It really sucks living so far away from my family.
There, that's it. That's pretty much the reason for the post. I don't have pictures to share. I always seem to forget the camera when they are here, just too much to do.
I'm just really sad to be so far away from 'home'.

Hayden vs. Maya

I don't know if it's a girl/boy thing or just the difference in two different kids. Since they are my own, I thought they'd have some similarities; I'm still looking for them!


Hayden: Tried a few times to open cupboards and then realized he couldn't get in, so he left them alone. I do have a couple that are child okay for fun. :)
Maya: She figured out out to open the child-proof cupboards. You know, the ones with the little white lever thing?

Hayden: We didn't have a dog, but had a cat. Never went to the bowl to empty or eat.
Maya: Into the dog dish, all the time. She starting to veer away when we catch her starting, but she still darts for it.

Hayden: Bathtub... We had the bathseat that hooks onto the edge of the tub and swivels. Never attempted to get out until he was almost a year and half and by then he was fine to be out.
Maya: She figured out really early on how to stand up, at about 11 months. We've since taken the seat out and let her move around.

Hayden: Has yet to break a dish, just broke a porcelain cat I had on a low shelf as a crawler. My fault, not his.
Maya: Has already broken two dishes. One corningware dish which I am now down to only one (thanks to myself and my mom) (see above about child-proof cupboards) and Saturday she pulled off a placemat from the table with a plate already on it. Scared the crap out of her!! Maybe that will deter her...

Hayden: STILL wants to just ride in the stroller. He would go for hours as a little guy in the mall. As long as it was moving, he was good.
Maya: HATES being in the stroller for too long. This was apparent at only a few weeks old. She wanted to be held so she could see out. Now, she wants to stand up in the stroller or walk.

Hayden: We never strapped the kid in the highchair. Okay, we did when we first got it, but then realized it was a pain and he would just put his arms up when he wanted out. He sat, ate and waited basically
Maya: Has figured out how to stand up in the high chair and will do so within minutes and now has to be strapped in.

Hayden: Is a bit of a picky eater.
Maya: Tries anything to eat and usually eats anything.

Hayden: Cars
Maya: Purses

Hayden: Wasn't really a climber. He got the stairs and those had the gate, so it was no biggy. He figured out how to get on the coffee table, but the fun wore off quickly. He didn't climb onto stuff to get stuff, just pointed and looked for someone to get it.
Maya: Moves tubs, chairs and whatever so she can climb onto anything. Figured out up and down the stairs too fast. Will attempt stacked tubs to get to the top if available.

Hayden: Napped twice a day no matter what.
Maya: If she takes a morning nap it HAS TO BE 30 minutes or less or there is no afternoon nap.

Hayden: Bald, then straight locks at nine months.
Maya: Full head of hair. Then, at nine months, spiral curls.

Both: FREAKING ADORABLE!!! :)

Catching up

The last two weeks have kind of gone by in a blur. Two weeks ago today, my Mom called me and told me Grandma had died. I still get teary and am still completely sad.

I flew out to Minnesota to attend the wake and funeral and stay a couple extra days to help. It was a weird flight and drive home. I flew with Maya and my brother. It wasn't like we were crying the entire trip, I think it was that we were both just dreading what we were flying home for. I left Hayden home with my Mom-in-law so he could still go to preschool. He had such a fun week planned, that I figured it would be better for him to just stay. Buddy had been planning a big hunting trip for like a year and had put so much time and money into it, Grandma would have wanted him to go. My Sis-in-law was flying out the next day. So, that's why just the three of us.

We arrived on Monday and went straight to Grandma's apartment. Mom was there, and the second we hugged, I lost it. In a way I was happy that Grandma wasn't still living at home. I didn't have as many memories attached to her in the apartment, so it was easier to walk around there and not break down.

Tuesday was the wake and I think it was actually a good one. The great-grandkids were running around, laughing, making noise and having a blast. They were told to quiet down a few times, but we all kind of realized that Grandma would love the noise! And they played freely.

(Maya and I either before or after the wake, I can't remember.)

Wednesday, the funeral, went well and was an emotional day. It's hard to remember things from the day. Afterwards, the family met up at my parents house and reminissed, talked and enjoyed the time together. It's been a really long time since we have all been under one roof together.

Thursday was a day of cleaning out the rest of Grandma's stuff from her place. It was rainy, dreary and chilly. I didn't mind though. We don't get those days here in Arizona. However, with the rain again on Friday, came snow. That, I don't miss. Not in October anyway.

I wanted to get back home on Saturday so I could be home to take Hayden and Maya trick-or-treating. I think I should have stayed in Minnesota. Halloween was a bust. Maya, loved her costume and was the cutest flower. She ended up falling out of her stroller and kissing the pavement causing a nice scratch on her nose and a bruise on her forehead. But, she kept on. Hayden is another story. I was so excited to take him since last year he had ran up to every house, knocked, said trick-or-treat and came home with a bucketload. This year, not so much. He HATED his costume, CRIED all the way to his teacher's house and cried all the way back. I was just so mad and already a basketcase emotionally, that I did not accept this well. Lots of yelling, threats and hands flailing were done by me. I realize I could have handled the situation better, but, at the time, I was just exhausted.

(the best I got of the two of them together)

One house was all we went to. I look at the bright side as this: we hardly have any candy that I would end up eating!

This week has gone by in a blur. I was extremely lazy. My mom-in-law, thank the Lord, stayed until Wednesday. I'm still tired, but am moving more. I still find myself zoning out and thinking of my Grandma. I have yet to completely unpack my suitcase, it's still on my bathroom floor wide open with only a few things in it.

This loss is going to take awhile to fade. I have three boxes of her things being shipped as I type. Opening them will be emotional. I'll make sure to have the Kleenex box prepared.

Slow Dance

This was a poem found in my Grandma's home. She had gotten it in a Christmas card at some point and must have thought it meaningful, because she kept it.
It was printed on the back of the funeral program and read during the service. It is now framed and out so I will see it everyday. The author is unknown.

Slow Dance

Have you ever watched kids on a merry-go-round
or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight
or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down; don't dance so fast
Time is short, the music won't last.

Do you run through each day on the fly?
When you ask "How are you," do you hear the reply?

When day is done do you lie in bed
with the next hundred chores running through your head?

You better slow down; don't dance so fast
Time is short, the music won't last.

Ever told a child we'll do it tomorrow
and in your haste not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch; let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time to call and say, "Hi?"

You better slow down; don't dance so fast
Time is short, the music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere
you miss the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
it is like an unopened gift thrown away.

Life is not a race; do take it slower.
Hear the music before the song is over.

A fond, but sad, farewell.

I shed a lot of tears today, I still am. Mostly tears of sadness, but there were some tears of happiness mixed in.
My Grandma died today. I don't like the term "passed away". Passing is something that continues on, death does not. It's an end to something wonderful and to some, like me, a new beginning. My Grandma died today. It wasn't unexpected but it is sad all the same. She had been hospitalized, moved into an assisted living facility and hospitalized again within the last year and a half. We were so lucky to have her as long as we did. And I know she is amazingly happy right now.
I am sitting here with tears streaming down my cheeks. I have a glass of wine next to me. It was her glass. One of a set of four that my mom had given her for Christmas a few years ago and there wasn't room in her new home for them. I got them. I enjoyed them while she was still here and I will enjoy them more now, knowing that now she is so much happier.
My Grandpa died in March of 1996. That was very hard for her. It was hard for the entire family, but you knew she was suffering because she had lost the love of her life. There was a spark that they shared that I haven't seen from anyone else. They literally lit each other up. My Grandma once told me that she wished Grandpa could have met my husband. She knew they would have really like each other. I believe they would have too.
Since then, I graduated college, got married and had 2 children. All of which she has been a part of. My kids are so lucky to have met her!! Even though I know they won't remember her, I know how much she enjoyed them.
I will miss visiting with her when I go back home to Minnesota. I will miss the card playing, wine drinking and talking.
But with all I will miss, I will also know that she is so incredibly happy right now. She is with the man of her dreams. Playing cards and drinking wine, maybe a few Manhattans thrown in. It must be such a beautiful feeling.

Replenishment

I have my coffee in the morning and use the facilities numerous times because of it. I always leave the door open because guarenteed I will have a visit from at least one.

Today, I heard the pitter patter of little bare feet on the tile approaching. Little Miss Maya came toddling in, with a big smile on her face and my coffee cup held in her hands. She held the cup out to me with a look that said, "Here Mommy, I thought you needed this, so I brought it to you!"

Apparently you must replenish what you have just lost?

She looked so proud of herself!! I took the cup, put it down, scooped her up, Gave her a big hug and a Thank You, and walked out to a little trail of puddles.

Such a sweetheart.

*I must add that the cup was less than half full and not hot at all!! :)

My Name is Maya, and I have an addiction...

Miss Maya had a little growth spurt in her feet. That means... SHOE SHOPPING!! For me yeah!! For the bank account, uh oh. Luckily, with sales on Etsy and Ebay, the paypal account is growing, so online shopping it is!

Last week, I found two pair, for a great price, new, on Ebay; one a more dressy and black, the other sneakerlike and leopard. There, done. I did want to find just one more though. I remembered I had a pair of shoes that I saved from Hayden. I figured they could be either boy or girl, so there's a pair. I tried them on her, figuring we'd put them on to see if they fit and put them away. Nope. She started screaming and kicking her feet when I went to take them off. She then proceeded to just walk around the house, non-stop for about a half hour. I don't know if it was the clunky sound they made as she walked or she just liked the feel, but she didn't want those suckers off!

Well, you can't see them that well, but she was walking so darn fast I couldn't get a clear pic!! Timberlands and a dress. Fabulous!

The next day, in the mail, an old friend sent me a huge box of clothes for her and it included a pair of sneakers. I put those on the chair and Maya saw them. Carried them around for awhile and then decided she needed them on. She sat herself down and held the shoes up making her "Mommy, tend to me now" grunting. Another half hour of walking with those on her feet. Just walking. Picked up a toy here and there to carry around. But mainly just walking.

Friday I had to go to Target. As we were roaming the isles, we wandered to the shoe section. I figured a little look wouldn't hurt. I think we tried on 10 different styles and colors, we had to have tried at least that. As I started to pull off the first one, she whined. Put on another pair and started to take it off, she whined. This happened through the whole trying on/taking off adventure. She didn't get crabby or snotty, but just made a little whine as the shoes were slipped off her feet. And then I tried on a pink pair again, thinking those were the ones, decided to get them and then went for the shoes to take them off to put in the bag (we were using the stroller, not a cart). You'd think I was taking away her favorite toy. Kicked her feet, whined a little harder. I pulled off the tag, let her wear them the rest of the time, she never made another peep.

Vikings win!! Kids don't care!!

You know how you occasionally have "matching" outfits sometimes with two or more kids? And they end up wearing those outfits at the same time because you make them because it's Monday night football and the Vikings are on. So because you have forced them into these outfits (okay, not really outfits, but you get the drift) you have to get a picture of them in the outfits, right?

Not so easy though, is it?!

So that's what I get to put in their books. Chances of Maya wearing that dress again are slim. She's 14 months, the dress is 6-9 months. And why Daddy thought posing by the grill was a good idea, I'll never know.

Things on a DAILY basis...

What is it with little boys and using words when they do not need to be used? Lately my posts have been about my son and not my daughter...Why, you may ask, because she is so stinking cute and you want to hear more? Because my son is driving me CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lately, all that comes out of my son's mouth are these odd words and phrases. And they are for no apparent reason, with complete inappropriateness (is that a word?) and really, why?

Here we go:

butt

poop (not because he just did)

fart (see above)

eyeball (exactly, HUH?!)

poopoo

BLEHHHHH (complete with tongue hanging out)

Phrases include: "Oh my buuuutt." And yes, there is an extension of the letter U. "Oh my eyeball" Not because something is in there either.

And then there's the jumping off EVERYTHING. Running in the house, talking back, getting sent to the corner, often, Saying "What?" waaayyyy to often and just not being a very nice kid. And spitting!! MAN, spitting in any way he can think of. I am sooo incredibly sick of this one. This little thing here is a main reason for the corner chair now.

AND THEN we go to the doctor this past week and she says she is so impressed with how good he is, how polite, how interesting, how calm, how adorable he is. She doesn't have many patients that are as well behaved as him. Did I bring the same kid with me?! Or does she say that to everyone. She said she doesn't...

But, look at that face.

No you're not Mom

Me: making my adorable wipe holders.

Hayden: playing cars on a ramp with the changing table pad.

Me: "Hayden, don't stand on that chair, go get a different one."

Hayden: "No, this one's fine."

Me: "No, go get a different one because that one isn't safe and you can fall."

Hayden: "No, really, this one's fine I didn't fall."

Me: "Well, I said you need to get a different chair and what I say you do because I am Mom."

Hayden: "No, you're not Mom, you're Babe."

Never got a different chair. Didn't fall.

WHAT?!?!? He's 4 already!??

Four years ago....Headed to the hospital at 6:15am. Got the call at 5:30am to come on in to be induced. Prayers were finally answered. Having tried everything possible to get this baby out, it was just going to have to be this way and I was completely fine with that! At 9:13 pm our Hayden James arrived. 8 lbs 4 oz, 21 inches and perfect!

3 weeks

The first year just flew by so dang fast! One minute I was holding him all swaddled up and the next he's zipping around on his little feet. Seriously, SLOW DOWN!

First Birthday

I look at him from time to time and am just amazed that I carried this little baby in my arms and now he's this 'big' little boy who loves Corvettes, Transformers and preschool. He counts, signs the alphabet, remembers the smallest details, swims like a fish, and is in love with his sister.

The last year was a struggle with him. I am hoping he was just "testing the waters" and will start to settle down soon. He is a very sensitive guy but pretty tough when he needs to be.

As I type, he is enthralled in playing with his new Legos he got for his birthday. He is totally fine with Buddy building and himself observing how it's done. These are the little things I love. Playtime with Buddy and his little Buddy. It's quiet and he is playing, perfectly content.

So, now we're off to start his forth year. I cross my fingers tightly that it is the start of a good one!

FOUR YEARS OLD!!

Happy Birthday Grandma Ginny!!!

Today is my Grandma B's 90th birthday!! I can't believe it! She has had so many struggles the last few years, that my family is celebrating whether we are with her or not!

I will be having a glass (or two) of Chardonney this evening to aid in the celebration. That is her favorite. This weekend, she is taking in a show, a little shopping, maybe a movie and a nice hotel stay with her girls; my mom, aunt and a few bottles of Chardonney. She's getting out of "the home" as she likes to call it and enjoying the weekend the way she wants. Wish I could be there...

So, I will raise my glass later on, say "Cheers" and think of all the wonderful times that I have been lucky enough to have with my Grandma in just one third of her lifetime.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRANDMA!!!

Four years ago...

Four years ago today was my due date with my Hayden. Four years ago today I was jumping up and down trying to get him out. Four years ago today I was a bloating, water retaining whale who had done EVERYTHING to get this baby out. Okay, maybe not everything, but alot of things. Four years ago today I watched my due date sail past me without even the slightest contraction.
And now, I would do anything to get that time back. Revisit being pregnant with my first baby. Feel those rolls, kicks and hick-ups. Minus the 60 pound weight gain of course.
*Sorry, no picture will accompany this post. It really wasn't a pretty time for me.

My Swimmer!

It is quite amazing to me what the influence of older kids have on younger kids. Hayden's cousins, ages 8 and 5 were here for the weekend and the pool got TONS of use. All the kids were in the water most of Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Hayden pretty much wanted to do everything they did if he could.

At the beginning of the summer, Hayden was so enthused about swimming and taking lessons and being able too roam free in the water. That didn't happen. He didn't get to take swimming lessons because the times conflicted with preschool (summer session) and Maya's naptime. He wasn't bummed about it, but he did talk about wanting to go. Next summer for sure!

Anyway, when he'd get in the pool at the beginning of the summer he wanted nothing to do with going off the big step. He was content playing with cars and what ever he could use on the edge. FORGET kicking while being held. This was just a screaming match.

Then, I bought some "noodles" and he took a step. He would "swim by himself" with the noodle and kick around. This was awesome, he was finally moving! He was so proud of himself and showed off as much as he could. Just last month he would finally jump in by himself with the noodle. He even would move his arms while supported by the noodle. Major progress in June and July.

A couple weeks ago Buddy bought him a kickboard. Hayden took to that thing like a pro! Kicking around the pool, showing off.

And now, we have a fish! With his cousins here, he got to use some waterwings that they had brought! I thought he would be completely uninterested in them. He'd never seen them and they go on the arms. I think had I bought some and stuck them on him he would have thrown a fit. But, his aunt put them on him and sure enough he's jumping in just like his cousins, swimming with both hands and feet in motion and playing in the water like a "big"kid!!!!

And then, yesterday, I asked him if he could swim all by himself without the support of the waterwings just like Blake and Paige do. Ya know what he did? Swam all by himself without the waterwings, just like Blake and Paige!!! Granted not that far. He went from the bench, to me (probably 5 feet) and back again. But he did it alot! He loved practicing swimming.

The last thing he said when he got out of the pool was that he is going to do good in swimming lessons next time!

I just hope this continues into next April! YEAH HAYDEN!

The "sky" is finally clearing

The horrid week is over. My kids are behaving so nicely, with a little attitude thrown in of course. I am sitting here playing the "observant" parent. They are playing on the floor together, both laughing, both having a good time.
Maya is becoming an independent, daring, get into everything child. Hayden is becoming a boss to his sister, but is a protecter. He's loving, observant, sensitive, but his still all boy.
Hayden likes cars. Loves anything with wheels. There is not a day that goes by that there is not a truck, tractor, car, Monster Truck or plane that is not on the floor, table, chair or in his hand. He and Buddy practice the noises of what each vehicle makes. Hayden's faves? Corvette, Ferrari, and motorcycle. Anytime cars are involved, both their faces light up. They sit together on the couch/chair often, flipping through Motor Trend, AutoWeek or Automobile and Buddy tells Hayden all about each and every car. Hayden's favorite movie? Cars or Transformers, he can't decide. He likes to play in the sandbox with his big trucks, jump on the trampoline and loves to swim with Daddy. He is usually all play, all day but can sit back, relax and veg-out when he needs to.
Maya likes getting into everything. She climbs into and onto everything. Her latest discovery is planting herself on the shelf of the console table like she's part of the decor. Last night she wedged herself in the cupboard. Not the ordinary cupboard. The small one with the pull out. I was doing dishes, she was playing with dishes. One second she was sitting on the floor the next I saw a head sticking out of the approx. 18x18 inch space. She bolts for the stairs when she sees the gate is not up. I have found her sitting on top of the little play table the kids have upstairs. I walked into the house on Sunday after I'd been away for a bit to find her sitting on the end table, Hayden laughing at her and Buddy had made a quick trip to the garage!!! She's quick. Somehow, she has yet to fall from a high spot or the stairs. Knock on wood. She's not a cuddler, super bummed about that, but she will already, at age 1, just come to me and give me a hug or a kiss. That, I love.
Where am I going with this? I forgot. I was just thinking of the bad week that just passed. It lasted from Monday to Sunday. I am looking back and remembering all the yelling, crying, NO's that were said and wishing I could have calmed myself down a bit, taken a step back or just left the room for a moment. The last day and a half have been glorious by comparison. We've had a couple downers, but that is to be expected. Right now, both kids are playing, smiling, laughing, Hayden just started singing. I am praying the outlook continues.

Well, that was a bit of a ramble.